...You Probably Can.

 I don't know what your personal demons are.
I have no idea if yours are similar to mine, similar to other women...
But there is probably a list of things in your head, in your heart of:
 'Things I Wish I could do But I Cannot'
 There seems a limitless essay in my head about how destructive negativity is
And this morning i had a quiet revelation and gentle 'Get Me' about how far i have come in Getting The Life I Want.
Nobody handed me my business and said "Lucky Lady, enjoy" i have been building this for years, carefully and gradually, in-between other areas of my life.
I never EVER thought i would understanding BookKeeping and Currency Exchange Rates.
But it seems that i now have a good general grasp of it. And i can use that skill.
 I never EVER thought i could be into photography. My lack of photographic skills was a family joke for years. But the age of digital came... and i found my passion, worked on my photoshopping skills. I began to understand the importance of light, the quality of different light...
I can probably take quite a good photo now.
 I never thought i'd have the confidence...
: to run! i told myself "i will not EVER run. It is impossible for me"  But i do. I am.
: to lose weight! i told myself  "It's no fun. I cannot be bothered" But i like myself slimmer, so much more.
: to get a dog! i told myself  "i haven't got time, they're just more responsibility" how i arrogant am i? This boy gives sooo much more than he takes.
And still my head is full of all the things i haven't done yet... things i need to negotiate, over time. To find the time to do. To find the money to do them... 'tick tock tick tock'   little ambitions sitting, waiting, impatiently. And i'm not 'not' doing them because i am full of doubt and negativity, i am just waiting, saving, putting the greater plan into action. the wider picture... the longer term goals...
 
 What are the things you really want IN your life?
What are the things you really WANT out of your life?
Where's that list of "Ten things i want to Try"?
 Because the list you keep in your head - all those 'demons'
Those nagging self-doubts and years of built up negativity...
they are just that: inside your head. Not neccessarily 'put' there by you, but they are kept there by you.

If you have a list of things you really, really, really want to try
If there is a job, a hobby, a LIFE! you really want to have,
Then you probably can have it.
It won't be easy (i am always shattered!)
But once you've got it, you might wonder why you didn't get it sooner.?

15 comments:

gillianleesmith said...

Love love love this post!! It is so true!!!

Bigbluebed said...

Thank you!

teeny tiny house said...

a very inspiring post x

All About Us. said...

soooo inspiring kirsty. Its like your physic and new i was having a 'why am i trying to do this' day.

PaperFish! said...

We all forget how very much we are capable of...

::cupcakesandbiscuits:: said...

Very positive poderings my love, I shall ponder over them....x

Gillian and Kirsty said...

Oh so right my friend. I have known you now for quite some time and have watched you grow with your business and seen, even though from a distance, the situations life has thrown at you. I am so PROUD of you and continuously inspired, Go You I say!!!! Kirsty(2)Xxx

Flossy said...

what an inspirational post! I've been going through several major changes in my life and am realising the exact same thing more and more, the only person holding me back is me, once you acknowledge that a whole new world opens!

Mrs Gibson said...

ALL the creative people I know are, or have in the past been, a slave confidence issues. The slightest thing can knock us back tenfold. I suppose it is symptomatic of wearing our hearts on our sleeves. After falling out with a former business partner it took me nearly 18 months to get back to 'normal' was so devastated by all the drama. Well done for building the life you deserve. xxx

PaperFish! said...

I know that Partner Gibbo! She was never worth the Angst x

Tamsyn Amber said...

What an inspiring post! Made me want to get out there and get on with it. I'm so pleased for you that you love your life.

Mrs B said...

these words have been going round and round my head, since I read it!....

"you probably can, you probably can"

perfect! inspiring in a suggestive, gentle but utterly persuasive way!

x

Mrs Gibson said...

Oh man Kirsty, I am so glad people can see that now, for the longest time I thought I was going mental. Good re-discovered friends have built me back up. I shall never let them go. ALSO 'You probably can' should be our collective mantra. Awesome.

millefeuilles said...

A brilliant post.

I, like many others I imagine, feel exactly the same as you do. I don't know how old you are but as you hit the 40 mark that ticking noise and to do list just keeps getting louder and longer.

I would very much like to write all the things I would really love to do in my life but it is very late tonight and I have been writing for a good few hours. I do know however that I want to be creating. That sounds so naff but it is becoming vital to my joy and the joy of those around me.

The question I ask myself is how much should one sacrifice for the well-being of one's children. Yes, that is a question I often ask myself.

Good night.

Cloudberryskies said...

I love reading your blog! It's refreshing to know that I'm not the only one who feels that way sometimes and it's great to see you overcoming your doubts. Keep up the good work. :)

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